We Love you!!!Saturday, January 26, 2008
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
Betrayal
Betrayal comes in many forms as a parent. Many many forms.
Some examples - 1. sitting with another mom at a class party.
2. blanket statements "I only love Daddy" or "I love Daddy more" or "I don't love you."
3. immediately going to another authority source when the answer received is not satisfactory.
All of these can be tolerated, excused, and indeed called other things. But there are a few forms of betrayal that cut very deep, and we are going to talk about one of the worst today.
The bitterest form of betrayal is when you, the parent perceive yourself as sacrificial and tolerant and that behavior is not mirrored.
Let's talk for a moment about The Sound of Music. Faithful readers know the girls saw it last year on stage and it has been a constant lovefest of all things Maria and Lisle ever since. I didn't grow up with TSOM. Never even saw it until a few years ago. Sure, I had friends (Christine, Brian, and Mark) who would endlessly sing the lyrics into their twenties and could probably do so today if you called them up and did a request. Not only did I not participate, I just didn't get it. Now, having sat through the movie a few times I can say I understand a certain appeal but I don't quite get it and I definitely don't get both girls' obsession with it.
We sing all the time in our family. Way more than average I think, although I have no scientific basis for that claim.
Evie learned all of the words to Doe a Deer in November. Since then she has sung the song a minimum of three times a day (no exaggeration) and in fact some times it is as much as a dozen times a day (again, no exaggeration.) Three months later, if I never hear Doe a Deer again, I'd be a happy well adjusted person (the only way it will ever happen, I know.) Nonetheless, every day I applaud the song when it is sung and even participate when invited.
Here comes the betrayal part.
I LOVE Cole Porter and Gershwin etc. Before TSOM, we would listen and sing both regularly. Since Maria and that dratted Captain Von Trapp came along both have fallen completely from favor.
Sensing an opportunity in song round last week on the way to school I slipped in the ever clever, ever a crowd pleaser "Be A Clown" during my turn and had the girls join in.
Two days later, I tried it again and then the betrayal....
"Momma, I'm TIRED of THAT song!!!"
Some examples - 1. sitting with another mom at a class party.
2. blanket statements "I only love Daddy" or "I love Daddy more" or "I don't love you."
3. immediately going to another authority source when the answer received is not satisfactory.
All of these can be tolerated, excused, and indeed called other things. But there are a few forms of betrayal that cut very deep, and we are going to talk about one of the worst today.
The bitterest form of betrayal is when you, the parent perceive yourself as sacrificial and tolerant and that behavior is not mirrored.
Let's talk for a moment about The Sound of Music. Faithful readers know the girls saw it last year on stage and it has been a constant lovefest of all things Maria and Lisle ever since. I didn't grow up with TSOM. Never even saw it until a few years ago. Sure, I had friends (Christine, Brian, and Mark) who would endlessly sing the lyrics into their twenties and could probably do so today if you called them up and did a request. Not only did I not participate, I just didn't get it. Now, having sat through the movie a few times I can say I understand a certain appeal but I don't quite get it and I definitely don't get both girls' obsession with it.
We sing all the time in our family. Way more than average I think, although I have no scientific basis for that claim.
Evie learned all of the words to Doe a Deer in November. Since then she has sung the song a minimum of three times a day (no exaggeration) and in fact some times it is as much as a dozen times a day (again, no exaggeration.) Three months later, if I never hear Doe a Deer again, I'd be a happy well adjusted person (the only way it will ever happen, I know.) Nonetheless, every day I applaud the song when it is sung and even participate when invited.
Here comes the betrayal part.
I LOVE Cole Porter and Gershwin etc. Before TSOM, we would listen and sing both regularly. Since Maria and that dratted Captain Von Trapp came along both have fallen completely from favor.
Sensing an opportunity in song round last week on the way to school I slipped in the ever clever, ever a crowd pleaser "Be A Clown" during my turn and had the girls join in.
Two days later, I tried it again and then the betrayal....
"Momma, I'm TIRED of THAT song!!!"
Monday, January 21, 2008
An Open Letter to Jose Mugrabi
Dear Mr. Mugrabi,
I recently read an article in the Wall Street Journal about your unparalleled collection of 800 works by Andy Warhol. First, I commend you for your insight into collecting and the shrewd manner in which you control the market value of Andy's work. It is a brilliant strategy and demonstrates not only exceptional business acumen, but great market finesse and exceptional taste as well.
This message is really about my daughter Juliette.
Living in DC, Juliette and Genevieve have had substantial exposure to fine art, with a strong emphasis on contemporary and past century giants. Evie enjoys Edward Hopper, having visited the recent National Gallery exhibit twice, she can quickly spot his minimalistic brilliance. Both girls also really enjoyed the Jasper Johns show early in 2007 as well. Juliette enjoys almost any art period, but there is really only one artist that she LOVES, and that is Andy Warhol. I wish I could take credit for this as I love Warhol too, but it has more to do with her amazing uncles, especially her artist uncle Jerry who taught her to spot Warhol's work last summer when she was four and she has been hooked ever since. Today when we were talking about fun things to do in DC, she brought up going to see Andy Warhol at the Portrait Gallery and said it simply had to be on the list.
You may or may not know she turned five last week. Like her sister, Genevieve, Juliette is an adored little girl - doted on by friends and family. Her grandparents, aunt & uncle and parents all chipped in to get her a new bicycle. There were lots of other presents too, so we held the bike in the other room until last. Before we brought it out, after all of the other presents were opened, we asked her if she was disappointed she didn't receive any specific gifts (many hints had been dropped about the bike and she had been without one for a few months.) She thought about it for a moment, said she loved ALL of her presents, but had really been hoping for something by Andy Warhol. We think she meant stationary, but with the timing of the Journal article...
This is where you come in Mr. Mugrabi. You no doubt have something Warhol has done that Juliette would love - she is particularly fond of the shoe series he did early on (she has the calendar), the cats, and most of all the Marilyns. I expect your stockpile of Marilyn's is too valuable to part with, but do check with your assistant about some of the lesser known, less valuable pieces that come to mind when you think of Juliette. We would consider a trade of Juliette's art, and if you are willing to stockpile yet another artist this would be another chance to get in early as you did with Warhol.
It would make her fifth birthday even better, and would definitely help when it comes time to put her (and Evie) through college.
With respect and admiration,
Juliette's mom
I recently read an article in the Wall Street Journal about your unparalleled collection of 800 works by Andy Warhol. First, I commend you for your insight into collecting and the shrewd manner in which you control the market value of Andy's work. It is a brilliant strategy and demonstrates not only exceptional business acumen, but great market finesse and exceptional taste as well.
This message is really about my daughter Juliette.
Living in DC, Juliette and Genevieve have had substantial exposure to fine art, with a strong emphasis on contemporary and past century giants. Evie enjoys Edward Hopper, having visited the recent National Gallery exhibit twice, she can quickly spot his minimalistic brilliance. Both girls also really enjoyed the Jasper Johns show early in 2007 as well. Juliette enjoys almost any art period, but there is really only one artist that she LOVES, and that is Andy Warhol. I wish I could take credit for this as I love Warhol too, but it has more to do with her amazing uncles, especially her artist uncle Jerry who taught her to spot Warhol's work last summer when she was four and she has been hooked ever since. Today when we were talking about fun things to do in DC, she brought up going to see Andy Warhol at the Portrait Gallery and said it simply had to be on the list.
You may or may not know she turned five last week. Like her sister, Genevieve, Juliette is an adored little girl - doted on by friends and family. Her grandparents, aunt & uncle and parents all chipped in to get her a new bicycle. There were lots of other presents too, so we held the bike in the other room until last. Before we brought it out, after all of the other presents were opened, we asked her if she was disappointed she didn't receive any specific gifts (many hints had been dropped about the bike and she had been without one for a few months.) She thought about it for a moment, said she loved ALL of her presents, but had really been hoping for something by Andy Warhol. We think she meant stationary, but with the timing of the Journal article...
This is where you come in Mr. Mugrabi. You no doubt have something Warhol has done that Juliette would love - she is particularly fond of the shoe series he did early on (she has the calendar), the cats, and most of all the Marilyns. I expect your stockpile of Marilyn's is too valuable to part with, but do check with your assistant about some of the lesser known, less valuable pieces that come to mind when you think of Juliette. We would consider a trade of Juliette's art, and if you are willing to stockpile yet another artist this would be another chance to get in early as you did with Warhol.
It would make her fifth birthday even better, and would definitely help when it comes time to put her (and Evie) through college.
With respect and admiration,
Juliette's mom
Friday, January 18, 2008
Thursday, January 17, 2008
Monday, January 14, 2008
The things we do for love
If only it were walking in the rain and the snow when there is no place to go and your feeling like a part of you is dying....
Miss Sugar retired, so we needed to find a new place for ballet.
So the things we do for love is really, more about getting up at 5:30 am to drive in your car and get a number (22 by the way) that will in turn allow you to register your child for ballet.
After I picked up said number, I went to Starbucks, natch, and went home to grab a shower.
Then I got the girls up, got them breakfast and took them to Sara's house (her mom owed me a favor) while I went back to line.
This isn't what I was supposed to do, I found out later. I was supposed to sit unshowered, uncaffienated, and wait my turn like everyone else.
I'm chalking it up to newcomer learning curve, but the other mothers aren't buying it.
Being # 22, I want you to know I got the last spot in Evie's ballet class, and although Juliette's friends made it in, Evie's didn't. These are people we go to school with and regularly see on the playground.
Now I am the mom who skipped the sitting in line for caffeine and a shower and their little lovies got bumped from their ballet class while they sat there and waited in line - unshowered, uncaffeinated.
These are definitely the things we do for love. However crazy and absolutely foolish they are.
They are also the types of things we hold over our children's heads at 12 and 13 to guilt them into going on family outings or taking out the trash.
Yep, I know what I'm doing.
Miss Sugar retired, so we needed to find a new place for ballet.
So the things we do for love is really, more about getting up at 5:30 am to drive in your car and get a number (22 by the way) that will in turn allow you to register your child for ballet.
After I picked up said number, I went to Starbucks, natch, and went home to grab a shower.
Then I got the girls up, got them breakfast and took them to Sara's house (her mom owed me a favor) while I went back to line.
This isn't what I was supposed to do, I found out later. I was supposed to sit unshowered, uncaffienated, and wait my turn like everyone else.
I'm chalking it up to newcomer learning curve, but the other mothers aren't buying it.
Being # 22, I want you to know I got the last spot in Evie's ballet class, and although Juliette's friends made it in, Evie's didn't. These are people we go to school with and regularly see on the playground.
Now I am the mom who skipped the sitting in line for caffeine and a shower and their little lovies got bumped from their ballet class while they sat there and waited in line - unshowered, uncaffeinated.
These are definitely the things we do for love. However crazy and absolutely foolish they are.
They are also the types of things we hold over our children's heads at 12 and 13 to guilt them into going on family outings or taking out the trash.
Yep, I know what I'm doing.
Friday, January 04, 2008
What about the camels?
So, for better or worse, we've played down Santa around here. Juliette was/is petrified of the man in the red suit and Evie has followed her sister's cue (maybe out of collegiality or maybe from genuine fear, we are not sure.)
Here is a typical Santa discussion - scene: approaching the mall from the parking garage.
Juliette, hand tightening around mine in a death grip. "Will Santa be here????"
Me trying to seize a teachable moment, "No, he is only there at Christmas time, and what do we know about St. Nicholas?"
Juliette, bored from repetition but still not feeling safe "He is not real and the real St. Nicholas was someone who gave away everything and helped many children a long time ago..."
Me continuing, trying to stave off phone calls from angry parents "But we don't talk about Santa outside of our family because some children still believe in him, right?"
You get the picture.
A recent parenting lesson showed me that such knowledge does not transfer.
The tooth fairy is real - when I dared suggest otherwise I got an incredulous ???WHAT????
I learned that lesson.
That is why, today, there are shoes in the hallway and both girls are blissfully asleep at 2:30 in the afternoon. They are waiting for their gifts from the wise men. They know the wise men can't come until they are both asleep.
In my defense, it was entirely their teacher's doing. Epiphany is a big thing at their preschool. Everyone in king hats and going on pilgrimages... Juliette had to leave early, so her teacher slipped me a gift to sneak into a shoe.
Now Evie's shoe is full as is Juliette's. I haven't thought of anything for me or Bruce yet. An apple? A stick of cheese?
Juliette wanted to know what the camels would do while the wise men visited. I told her the wise men would have to use our hose and they could eat the grass, because the camels weren't allowed to come in the house.
Please don't judge me, but can the wise men plan to make regular visits? I'm willing to negotiate hay and carrots for the camels.
Here is a typical Santa discussion - scene: approaching the mall from the parking garage.
Juliette, hand tightening around mine in a death grip. "Will Santa be here????"
Me trying to seize a teachable moment, "No, he is only there at Christmas time, and what do we know about St. Nicholas?"
Juliette, bored from repetition but still not feeling safe "He is not real and the real St. Nicholas was someone who gave away everything and helped many children a long time ago..."
Me continuing, trying to stave off phone calls from angry parents "But we don't talk about Santa outside of our family because some children still believe in him, right?"
You get the picture.
A recent parenting lesson showed me that such knowledge does not transfer.
The tooth fairy is real - when I dared suggest otherwise I got an incredulous ???WHAT????
I learned that lesson.
That is why, today, there are shoes in the hallway and both girls are blissfully asleep at 2:30 in the afternoon. They are waiting for their gifts from the wise men. They know the wise men can't come until they are both asleep.
In my defense, it was entirely their teacher's doing. Epiphany is a big thing at their preschool. Everyone in king hats and going on pilgrimages... Juliette had to leave early, so her teacher slipped me a gift to sneak into a shoe.
Now Evie's shoe is full as is Juliette's. I haven't thought of anything for me or Bruce yet. An apple? A stick of cheese?
Juliette wanted to know what the camels would do while the wise men visited. I told her the wise men would have to use our hose and they could eat the grass, because the camels weren't allowed to come in the house.
Please don't judge me, but can the wise men plan to make regular visits? I'm willing to negotiate hay and carrots for the camels.
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